People Who Like The Crap I Write About

Monday, December 13, 2010

Saving Old People From The Cold Is One Of My Hobbies

Ok, so I ran out of salt last night, which then reminded me it was about time to get groceries again. (I probably shouldn't even really be consuming or even thinking about salt because it makes me really puffy and I look like I'm hiding a few bags of cotton candy in my clothes.) So anyway, every time we go shopping, I have to drag Paul to the store and 9 times out of 10 I get lectured by him about "Stuff that I don't need and that I'm never going to use again". Last time it was about a container of freeze dried strawberries. This fell into the category of 'Stuff that I don't need'. Now, as much as I know Paul is right, deep, deep down, I still have to prove him wrong and buy the useless item that is up for debate. Last time it went something like this:

Paul: What are you going to do with those?

Me: I can put it in my oatmeal and muffins! (Pick it up, put it in the cart)

Paul: Yeah but that's what the organic raisins were for.

Me: Pleeease!? It's healthy!

Paul: You don't need it... (Oh God, not that response again!)

Me: I'm getting it!

Paul: Fine, then you're not getting dessert or any new clothes for a month.

Me: Deal! (Shit!)

(I'm still trying to figure out what I should use the freeze dried strawberries in...)

However, last night was a little different. I think Paul is finally starting to warm up to me buying useless crap for the hell of it! Either that or he realizes that there's just no use arguing with me. How do I know you ask? Because he put up very little fight to prevent me from buying these:

All Paul could do was stand there looking speechless. Seriously, could you refuse them? I like how they say 'Innocent' on the label, it made me feel even better for buying them.

Reasons I had to have one:
  • They were on sale, €1.50 to be exact (INCLUDING the hat)
  • There's 2 servings of fruit in one little bottle!
  • They made me laugh inside
  • 25c of the purchase goes to Age Action Ireland - 'Helping keep old people warm this winter' (I'm all for keeping old people warm, especially in Winter.)
  • And last but not least, the hat I chose reminded me of the homeless pigeon lady in the movie Home Alone 2. Even though she was a scary mute in the beginning, she was so nice to Macaulay Culkin at the end :)
I'm already making use of them. It's really cold outside so I thought they would be nice cozy hats for my eggs. Their names are Wally and Pigeon Lady.

They made excellent scrambled eggs this morning that would put Rachel Ray's to shame...That bitch! I think it's because of their new hats.

Any suggestions on what else I can use these for? I'm all for 'going green' and I'd hate for them to go to waste!


  1. how do you come up with all these ideas? very witty, creative and compassionate. keep them coming!

  2. oh my god amber this was so awesome~!~~~!!!!!!!