People Who Like The Crap I Write About

Thursday, January 20, 2011

How Can I Get Revenge On Derrick?




That's my dude friend Derrick above (who I blog about a lot because he is naturally stupid and an excellent waste-of-blog-space material)

A little background first:

About 3 years ago or so, I made the mistake of getting drunk while letting him and my other dude friend Mark, stay over at our place before they flew back to Salt Lake from Dublin...What's so bad about that you ask? They recorded my entire drunken episode!

To this day, Derrick still has footage of me drunk off my ass, rambling on about the pink Power Ranger (my fave) and God knows what else! He uses it as ammo and blackmail often.


I know, it's funny right?!??!?

Not!

One thing I have learned, is to never, ever, EVER get drunk while someone has a camera rolling!

Anyway, a week or so ago, I posted this on Derrick's Facebook page because that stupid bird on the right reminded me of him:


Well he took a snapshot from the footage and posted this on my Facebook page with the message: 'Two can play this game':


Ok, now that we've all stopped laughing, I'm livid! What should I do to get revenge?!? I'm almost 5,000 miles away so it has to be legal, clever and plausible!

Thanks for your suggestions in advance!

56 comments:

  1. hmmm, you could convince his family/friends that he got a stripper pregnant.

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  2. Haha not gonna happen, he's scared of girls! Whooooops!!!

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  3. Photoshop a picture of him in place of a porno actress in one of those gang bang videos. Like where all the dudes are standing around with their dicks in their hands waiting for a turn. Drop it on your blog-spread it around the net. Okay- that MIGHT be a bit harsh. lol

    theladiets.blogspot.com --- needs followers

    tinyurl.com/facebookrant --- share on facebook for the lulz

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  4. I like to do the "i burned your fucking house down, along with all your blackmail busllshit" trick..

    it just takes a little gas, a bottle, a rag, and a match...

    oh wait you said legal...

    fuck...can't help you there...

    Bruce
    bruce johnson jadip
    evilbruce
    stupid stuff i see and hear
    Bruce’s guy book
    the guy book
    Dreamodel Guy
    dreamodeling!

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  5. expect that video to be at your wedding!


    and to your response: no, i love eating chicken!

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  6. dha hahahahahahahha LMAO!!! AYAYAYA

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  7. If you have his address, subscribe him some gay magazines.

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  8. @ LA Diets - I've got self-diagnosed ADHD, ain't gonna happen! lol

    @ bruce - Good idea, but aside from being illegal, it's not plausible as I'm too far away :D

    @ SkimJim - Already married, but I'm kinda nervous this video will end up at our future children's birthday parties and graduations!

    @ Oilfield Trash - Please do, I know you're clever :)

    @ Chris - I really really like your idea! hahahahahahaha!

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  9. I'm liking the gay magazine idea.

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  10. Have you got any higher res, more brightly lit pics of him?

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  11. Maybe you should send him on a fake scavenger hunt that ends with a note saying "haha you've wasted your time :P"

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  12. Haha mormon porn, why didn't I think of it?!?!?! I'm limited to pics but I think I have one that would do justice, what are you thinking?

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  13. Your advice about not getting drunk while someone has a camera is something I really need to pay more attention to, lol.

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  14. Definitely take him out.

    Don't forget to follow, check, and support often your local information hot-spot lifeformation.blogspot.com!

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  15. Take a dump on his door step, south park style ;D

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  16. Looking good man, following your progress
    http://aboyandhisbeer.blogspot.com/
    http://funnyfunnyfinds.blogspot.com/

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  17. +1 for Chris' Idea.
    I did that too to this guy hitting on my girlfriend.
    He had to changed his email because of spam from gay sites.

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  18. chatroulette scam! chatroulette scam!
    make him think you're a 15 year old girl (or boy) and frame his as a pedo. thats always hilarious.

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  19. Easy-- get him just as drunk and take a video of him!

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  20. Ahaha I like the pic of the girl aahaha

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  21. take a dump on his porch, adam sandler style :)

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  22. I totally agree with the idea Chris had ^ but send them to his parent's house along with a forged positive HIV test from Planned Parenthood.

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  23. BTW, I just stole the retard picture of you and may use it later on my blog. ;)

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  24. Revenge isn't good! You should know better!

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  25. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  26. Rather than post links I'll email the images to you. Wouldn't want the poor fellow's pic to fall into the wrong hands.

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  27. Hahaha thanks for all the tips! Keep em coming!

    @ Hiphop rising - Hahaha if only! I'll have to wait til I come back to SLC!

    @ Sucio Sanchez - You are awesome! Thank you!

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  28. Just do some photo rant on him :) always works

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  29. Looking forward to see what you do for revenge. Followed.

    http://rhetoricrants.blogspot.com/

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  30. I want to see what Sucio did with the images.

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  31. Holy shit I lol'd your face is priceless. Derrick wins, sorry

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  32. I could do a number on him with a little Photoshop and imagination... And everyone knows Green Ranger is best... Badass flute and Godzilla zord! Even the Pink Ranger was smitten

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  33. Call him on an outside line pretending to be a federal marshall ask him about his recent love interest. Who far they went, then follow up with that she's been arrested for purposely infecting people with HIV. Everyone wins!

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  34. If you have his number and address... Call up every local pizza place and have each deliver him 4 Extra Large pizzas, with wings, and a soft drink from each :D

    http://lifeofbaron.blogspot.com

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  35. take him out for dinner, and then don't call him back

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  36. Hello Lovely,

    thanks for your comment :)!

    no we are not sisters:)! I know the pictures to look like this. hahaha

    sorry my english is so bad :(((((((((

    lovely I wish you a nice day.

    with love;)
    xoxo
    http://mar-iza.blogspot.com/

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  37. Inject him with a deadly virus and tell him that you have the antidote, but you want $20 for it. Then when he gives you the $20, tell him "just kidding, stupid, there's no antidote." Then walk away. Instant hilarity.

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  38. i dont know what to do but lol this is funny

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  39. mail him a neatly wrapped present with a tupperware container full of dog poop.

    also, general information: if you are adsensing, make sure you stay on the adsite for at least 20 seconds to allow for clicks to be registered. i've been making this mistake, but am encouraging everyone to change their methods of support if they want to start doing it right.

    longlive$$, delete this comment and spread this info elsewhere so everyone can know.

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  40. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

    Pretend you forgot about everything, don't even act mad or annoyed at him, get as close to him as possible....

    Next time you have the chance to be around him INSIST that you go out drinking(bring a camera)
    and while he is drinking and getting drunk, you're just drinking a little bit but pretending to get VERY drunk.

    Than when he starts acting stupid record him SECRETLY(unless he is so drunk he wouldn't care.

    ???????????
    ????????????
    ???????????????
    ?????????????????????


    PROFIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    Following and supporting.

    http://illuminatinwo.blogspot.com

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  41. Nice man! I followed and clicked your ads!

    Please hit me back! :)

    http://tennisgearcraze.blogspot.com/

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  42. Just do not pay attention to him.

    http://aizbaznis.blogspot.com

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  43. If you want me to do some photomagic... email me the pic(s) you want shooped and tell me what you want me to do for each one... noog045@hotmail.com

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  44. i hope you see this....


    I gave you an award (JADIP BLOG)

    Bruce
    Bruce Johnson JADIP
    Evil Twin
    Bruce’s Evil Twin
    The Dreamodeling Guy
    dreamodeling!
    The Guy Book
    The Guy Book

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  45. haha good luck with that. you are too far away to do some damadge

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  46. Hey, it's me Marduk. I have a new blog now. Check it out.

    http://moreduckslastchance.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  47. Oh man.....I wish I could suggest something solid. But for the moment I have nothing. :I Good luck!

    http://superhappygru.blogspot.com/

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